History can repeat

Is it me being paranoid or is it just him?
No.not him.Me.
I feel insecure and paranoid.Maybe because of that thing.
Oh boy,you'll never get over her will you?
Nevermind.I should stop caring anymore anyway.Why the fuck should I care?
Damn!I hate myself.
And what the fuck?you're getting jealous over small shit things!
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU HUH?!
okay relax.I need to let out the angst.
I seriously need to manipulate my insecurities.
Getting worried over small things only burden your life more.

I need to start flipping my notes and writing out my own notes.
I need to start drawing those sketches and layouts.
I need to start being studious.
I need to start getting serious in life.
I need to start to stop.
Okay.I don't know what the crap I'm talking about.
My mind's a haywire right now.
I need a smoke and a cold cold bath to calm my senses.
I know having a cold bath in the middle of the night is not the best idea but thats the only thing that I can think of.
Goodnight.